Hidden Cost of Narcissism: How One's Ego Can Drain Everyone!

What is a narcissist? "A person who has an excessive interest in or admiration of themselves". They tend to think the world revolves around them. 

Why does this matter? Narcissistic people lack empathy and have a sense of entitlement which can significantly impact personal and professional relationships. Being a sibling, parent, partner or even a colleague to a narcissistic person will cause you emotional distress. You will go through gaslighting, manipulation, even a loss of self-esteem dealing with such an individual. 

How can we lookout for the traits of a narcissistic person? They often expect to be recognized as superior even without having any accomplishments. They constantly are seeking a lot of attention and want the admiration from others as well. Narcissistic people also lack the ability to understand or even care about other people's feelings. 

According to the Mayo Clinic article on Narcissistic Personality Disorder, people with this "disorder" cause many problems in different areas of their lives. This can affect their relationships, financial, school, or even work matters. People with this "disorder" generally are not happy with anything in their lives. They are disappointed when no special favours or admiration is given to them when they feel they deserve it at all times. Narcissistic disorders appear during the teen years and early adulthood. 

Narcissistic Personality Disorder has 9 signs that you will notice in an individual. They are as follows:

1. Sense of self-importance

2. Preoccupation with power, beauty, or success

3. Entitled

4. Can only be around people who are important or special

5. Interpersonally exploitative for their own gain

6. Arrogant

7. Lack empathy

8. Must be admired

9. Envious of others or believe that others are envious of them 

In my dealings with a narcissistic individual, I tend to believe if someone wants help, they will get the help they need. If you have constantly had a chance to get help and you refuse to take action, you need to be dealt with differently. I prefer to set boundaries and strongly feel that babying these kinds of people will only make the situation worse. The more you continue to "baby" the behaviours, the more destruction happens because this behavior worsens. Boundaries are essential to avoid enabling their actions. 

I’ve known people with narcissistic tendencies. Over the years, one thing has remained constant: nothing ever seemed good enough for them. Every day brought a new wave of complaints. Whether it was something at work, school, on the train, or even a stranger walking too close on the street, there was always a problem — and it always revolved around them.

The result? There was rarely space for anyone else to have a bad day — or even a good one. If someone else dared to talk about their accomplishments or show happiness, the narcissist would respond with jealousy, anger, or even subtle sabotage. Over time, it felt like their presence dimmed everyone else's light. You begin to ask yourself: When does this kind of behavior stop? When does it get addressed — if ever?

At first, you're constantly told to let it go — “That’s just how they are.” You were expected to tiptoe around this person to avoid triggering their anger. You're told not to share your accomplishments or good news in front of them. And when you did — even something as simple as a good report card — their reaction was cold, monotone, dismissive.

Why? Because praise directed at you triggered their jealousy. Suddenly, the entire mood in your relationship would shift. They would mope, or lash out — sucking the joy out of everything. And for days, the energy from that stayed heavy and uncomfortable.

At first, you followed the rules: avoid upsetting them, don’t shine too brightly, don’t set them off. But here’s what was eventually learned — it was never enough. The more you tolerated, the worse the behavior got.

Eventually, you handle things differently. You stopped walking on eggshells. You begin to set boundaries. And do you know what happens? You now became the bad guy. 

Isn’t that something? The moment you start to set your boundaries, suddenly you are the problem. But just know: you’re not!

In my next post, I’ll share exactly how one can manage and escape that draining dynamic — and offer tips for anyone feeling stuck in the same cycle. Because nobody deserves to live in the shadow of someone else’s emotional chaos.

If you have ever dealt with a narcissistic person or you're dealing with one now, drop your story in the comments below. Let me know if you can relate!